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Mike Wallace, The Clever Monkey of the Week, attempts to increase interest in an interview by calling the madman of Iran “impressive”

After what we are told was a long pursuit of the unfortunate interview, Mike Wallace was finally summoned to Tehran for a meeting with the resident madman, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. Once there, he waited an impolite week for an audience with the blustery Mahmoud, The Magnificent.

We learn that Mike has been in pursuit of an interview with the culprit for so long that Ahmadinejad had to remind him when the impertinence began.

During the interview, Ahmadinejad carried on, we surmise, his treacherously willful way, saying of the Bush administration, "see how they talk down to my nation."

Who wouldn’t, given his conduct of it? In addition to the impossible quest of nuclear enrichment for peaceful purposes, we understand that Iran is now urging Shiite militias to increase their attacks against the American-led forces in retaliation for the Israeli assault on Hezbollah. The incitement has already led to an increase in mortar and rocket attacks on the fortified Green Zone.

There is also the well-founded foreboding that Iran will likely foment more violence when it confronts the US and the UN over its nuclear program in the weeks ahead.

But what does clever Mikey do? He comes right out, not with a cautioning aspersion, but with the irresponsible ploy for publicity: "He's an impressive fellow, this guy. He really is. He's obviously smart as hell…. You'll find him an interesting man. I expected more of a firebrand. I don't think he has the slightest doubt about how he feels ... about the American administration and the Zionist state. He comes across as more rational than I had expected."

Since we all know Mahmoud’s behavior is flagrantly dumb and dangerous, we can only surmise that Mike was doing his clever monkey best to drum up an audience for the interview by trying to paint the monster differently than we all know him to be.

In case you still want to watch, the interview will be aired on both the CBS Evening News and, of course, on 60 Minutes, which, given Wallace’s tenure might, at least for this program, be called, in honor of his age, which may finally and regrettably be compromising his judgment, 88 Minutes.

Submitted by:

Tom Attea

Tom Attea, humorist and creator of NewsLaugh.com, has had six shows produced Off-Broadway. Critics have called his writing "delightfully funny," "witty," with "great humor and ebullience" and "good, genuine laughs."





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