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How can you look the dog in the eyes ever again? Every timeyou call his name, he wallows in shame. You've banished himto the lowest level of dog name hell - you've named your Lab"Blackey."

Any four-year-old can explain that a dog's name shouldreflect something about him - the way he looks, the way heacts, what he likes to eat' something. So mostfour-year-olds will take the next most obvious step - naminga black dog Blackey... or Smokey... or something equallyinane.

The thought that so many grown adults were not able tomuster more creativity could undermine our society's basicfaith in democracy. So let's hope that the over-abundanceof such uninspiring monikers is the work of children -parents' having left the honor of naming the family pet tojunior or sissy. While common, this type of delegation israrely a good idea. Remember: Dogs can last half ageneration; your little tyke will be mighty embarrassed incollege to own up to a dog named Blackey.

So to help inspire you - or your little one - here are somemore unique names - and naming ideas - that might help youside-step the pit of pet name remorse:

1. Dirty Stuff: Grunge, Pitch, Soot (or Sooty),Spade

2. Darkness: Dusky, Midnight, Shade (or Shady),Twilight

3. Black / Dark Clothing: Patch, Sable, Suede,Tux (or Tuxedo), Velvet

4. Black Food: Gumbo, Goulash, Meatball,Meatloaf, Molasses, Mushroom, Plum, Rib-eye,Roux (Avoid Pepper)

5. Coffee Derivatives: Chicory, Latte, Mocha

6. Dark Beers: Guinness, Porter, Stout, Xingu

7. Small Black Dogs: (Also cute for very largedogs.) Scrap, Smudge, Smidgeon, Speck,Splotch, Wisp

8. Black as Evil: (These can be particularlycute for very large or very small dogs.)Cujo, Darth, Jezebel, Katrina, Lilith,Mordor, Reaper, Smut, Snitch, Sorrow, Vader,Vice, Wicked

9. Traditional or Famous Black First Names:(Most appropriate for African-Americanfamilies.) Tanika, Aisha, Oprah, Bionce,Latifa, Snoop

10. African Geography: Congo, Morocco, Rwanda,Uganda