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I*ve seen intelligent folks negotiated out of a great bargain, denied of a critical bank loan, flunk at an IPO road show and even kicked out of their houses by their spouses.

Just for one reason.

They simply can*t meet halfway. The negotiation starts with both parties neither yielding nor accomodating. Each one is simply preoccuppied with getting the most out of the negotiation encounter.

Poor negotiation skills lead to misunderstanding, then suspicion, then ultimately withdrawal. It's the fastest way to lose not just your shirt - but your associates and friends.

I*ve discovered four top negotiation skills that can make your next negotiation encounter a more satisfying one.

1. Never open with your position. Ask the other side, *So what would your offer be?* This way you keep your needs private and could bargain up or down based on what your negotiation sparring partners disclose.

2. Always come to the table with a focused outcome. If you know exactly what you want, you'll know how to drive the negotiation within those parameters. Unfortunately, many folks come to the table not even having an inkling as to what they desire. So they get frustrated each time an off-the-hat suggestion gets rebuffed.

3. Learn to elicit critieria and to match that criteria. In NLP, if you can find the other side's heirarchy of values by asking *What's important to you about xxx** at least thrice, you can find the underlying reasons for their proposals. Discover this, then you can easily and naturally tailor fit your suggestions to what they truly want.

4. Agree agree agree. At the onset and the middle part of the negotiation, you will naturally find it to your benefit to minimize blatant disagreement. Avoid the temptation to slam down fists and disagree because you feel it makes you look dominant. Rather, listen quietly, taken an open posture, smile, and couch your negations in rephrased statements that illuminate the beauty of your counter proposals.

Superb negotiation skills are built on this foundation. Develop them and you'll happily discover more fulfilling outcomes.