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OTHER ITA SITES:
Ratin' Fast Food
Sometimes I get the strangest emails. A couple of days ago, I had a woman write and ask me if I�d consider writing some restaurant reviews. She said she felt that most restaurant critics are highbrow types, and that it�d be a nice change if �a regular person� wrote some reviews. She then went on to suggest that I should start with the fast food chains first, then write about more locally based restaurants later.
Hmmmmm. Her idea is intriguing, but, to be honest, I genuinely wonder if ya�ll will give two flips as to what my opinions are regarding some of the fast food chains. On the other hand, the only way I�m gonna find out is to write about a few of them and see. So, without any further ado, here�s my take on some of the major fast food chains and their offerings:
Ci-Ci�s Pizza: If you don�t want to pay $19.95 for the �Bum Fights� video, just shell out around four bucks and check out the �all you can eat� buffet at Ci-Ci�s around dinner time.
Dairy Queen: The most underrated hamburger/fast food chain of them all. The burgers are great, plus, look at all their soda fountain choices - all kinds of sundaes and shakes. On top of that, these people make the best banana splits in the world. If you want to go to a particularly great location, try the Dairy Queen in Forsyth, Georgia. The food is great, and one or two of the women there are so good lookin� that they�ll make you lose your religion. A close second is the McCrae, Georgia DQ, the only problem there being that the women don�t flirt as much.
Hardee�s: The worst hamburgers in the world, they�re even drier than a KMart shoe. Their milkshakes used to be the one thing that made them worth an occasional shot, but they�ve even screwed those up now. For all you teenaged guys out there who want to break up with your girlfriend but can�t figure out how to do it, just take her out to a Hardee�s to eat the next time you go on a date. When she finishes eating, she�ll beg you to both take her home and get out of her life.
Krystal: I adore Krystal, but getting some ketchup packets out of �em is like stealing gold from Fort Knox.
McDonald�s: The food sucks, the decor is worse, and you�d better get ready to inventory your bag if you order more than two items utilizing their drive-thru. My money says that McDonald�s will end up being the Edsel of the fast food business.
Nu-Way: The best hot dogs in the world, and really shouldn�t be included in this list. Anybody knows that a Nu-Way is a gourmet treat, not a fast food offering.
Sonic: I love the Sonic! First, the old drive-in concept appeals to me, and they have some monster foot long hot dogs. They cover �em up in chili, add on a ton of fries, and will even bring a bucket of ketchup out to you if you want it. You also have the advantage of being able to sneak a smooch from your sweetie if the mood hits.
Steak and Shake: I love their food, but the one I patronize just got a bad health department rating because most of the cockroaches in middle Georgia seem to be congregating there. It shalt be a while before I return.
Subway: Great food, lots of choices, and you can actually watch your sandwich being put together. The only thing is, be careful when you ask for the jalapenos - they�re mega hot, and will cause your stomach to sing like Kate Smith just a few hours after you�ve eaten them.
Taco Bell: I love the food, and the prices can�t be beat. The only thing I don�t like about Taco Bell is when you pull up to the drive-thru, they�ll say something to you like, �Hello, welcome to Taco Bell, would you like to try our Gonzo Burrito?� If you�re not paying attention and forget to say �no,� you�ll end up with some very strange items in your bag.
Folks, I�ve got even more eatin �places I�d like to talk about, but, columns can only be so long, and I�ve about met my word limit for this week. Just remember, these are my opinions, just my opinions, and I�m sure some of ya�lls differ. But, as for me, as Ed Jr. says, if it quacks like a duck, and has feathers like a duck, well.....
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