Article Surfing Archive

We will relieve you from love dependence, advertising in the newspaper said. I have decided to find out what love dependence is and is it possible to get rid of it. So I went to the center of psychoanalysis.

The office situated in the center of Minsk in a usual apartment of a usual apartment house. The affable girl of model appearance met me. Surely it was already the very first step of treatment, I thought.

The head of the center was quiet and self-assured man with an imposing small beard, the candidate of psychological sciences Michael Maslov.

- Who addresses to you?

People from 15 till 60 years old. Men and women are equally. All of them united by one - the love brings them sufferings. As a rule, it's unshared love. Or after break of relations the person lives in the past. He or she torments and can't forget, how it all was good.

The person sleeps badly, speaks only about beloved, he's not interested in surrounding life. He can sending ten SMS per hour to object of his love, calling without end, sending cards and flowers, drawing something on the ground, ordering music pieces on the radio' But it doesn't improve his mood. The person destroys himself, conducts himself inadequately.

For example, he collects the most insignificant things connected to object of dependence: the ticket after casual joint trip in bus or a group photo on which his love is slightly visible.

Sometimes the person addresses to us absolutely by other occasion: a constant sleeplessness and inexplicable headaches. Actually as it appears, he subconsciously torments from one-way love, but he does not understand it. All this we name love-dependence.

- How quickly you can help to get rid of it?

- Sometimes it's enough only one session. In more difficult cases it can be necessary a little more. It is necessary try to change the attitude of the person first of all to himself. To take a look on the situation from the outside.

- Why so many people suffer from love-dependence?

- Dependence on love for example practically does not differ from alcoholic or narcotic dependence. The person aspires to thing that can give to him the pleasure. It is pleasant to take alcohol or to eat a chocolate or to work a lot or to long for someone. He is attracted with a witticism of sensations.

It was so pleasantly for the person that when the volume of pleasure decreased he wants repeat it at any cost. He would be desirable to think of loved to meet him. And even it is easier to dream about love at times than to have it in reality. It's already love dependence which needs to be treated.

- Are there any unusual complaints of patients?

- Sometimes patients confuse dependence on love with sexual affection and ask to reduce a tiresome inclination of the partner. Someone complains that cannot fall in love. Then we try to relieve from dislike.

Three ways to get rid of love:

1. Organize your schedule such a way that not a minute remains for love dreams.

2. Avoid places and people causing painful memoirs. Though it's difficult try to remember only bad about beloved.

3. Take a paper. On one half write what you have won from your novel, on another what you have got from break.