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Anecdotes and Wisdom, Wit, Humor, Satire, Quotes, Jokes of the late witty Orhan Seyfi Ari

Fedai, Halkin Sesi -27 Dec. 92

'' He always wore a smile...'

In his articles little stories, jokes, humor, satire, made witty teacher thinker poet Orhan Ari's [died 1992] points social, intellectual, political, spiritual, philosophical.

Diplomatic communiques were like broadcasting live on the radio a match between two boxers Abdi and Bandinelli, and announcing the winner as Abdinelli'

World's troubles.. asthmatics'd become deep sea divers.

Never too late to change one's mind, to make a start?! A driver rolling down a cliff deciding to drive carefully!?

Ignorant we all were -some, even of their ignorance...

Irrelevancy was a natural common refuge of man ~'You've gone bald!' he joked with a friend who responded, 'Ha! As if your son's got more hair than I!'

Perseverance was a matter of whether one had a better purpose than a rope denting the stone of a well or will stronger than little delicate plants' shooting, growing, through cracks of concrete country pavements.

Whined a friend 'Missed my train.. only five minutes late!' He said 'You'd've also if you were 5 seconds late.'

Referendums often asked if the patient preferred the blanket to cover the feet by exposing the behind.

Evolution.. 'we were apes'.. weren't we, now, 'man'!?

Reincarnation.. whoever died first would inform the other ~one died -a bird flew in through the window -'My friend 'letting me know' reasoned the other.

Justifications of some reminded of a teenager he'd given a booklet: 'smoking kills early.' He was shown a newspaper: an old man was a smoker.

Relationships were like using a mirror: could one make faces expecting to see a smiling image?

Avoidance of issues often was avoidance of embarrassment ~'Why's that?' asks the child 'the parent replies 'Oh look, a bird.. flying!'

Skill was in building things 'any fool could wreck them...

Spiritual concern needless? Babies in wombs not knowing what next did consider needless limbs...

Cheap goods to buy only the wealthy could afford.

Strength didn't necessarily suffice ~'I am a boxer!' threatened one 'the other laughed 'I am a runner!..'

Importance was relative ~a farmer'd talked on sowing, reaping 'a farm boy bragged 'Exactly 99 flies sat on our cow as he talked 'I was counting them.'

Society the individuals comprised of ~but each lamb at the abattoir hung by its own legs.

Obedience had to be understood the reason for, else it backfired ~'Musn't practise drums without asking!' parent told child practising during siesta 'child woke parent up to ask if could...

Assumption that what didn't glitter wasn't gold, not of value? Like platinum 'even rarer, more precious!?

Explanations of some were like a co-op shop saying a folding fan broke because it was fanned, or ant repellent should be put into ants' eyes.

Politics external were like a native saying 'Hurry up' and an alien responding 'Harry no up 'is downstairs.'

God perhaps did not exist -but what if He did..?!

Elixir.. cure for all ailments, people bought well ~the tank emptied 'it was refilled with tap water.

Clean would a missionary who'd not heard of nonwhites a black boy ~and scraped the boy's skin off...

Brave.. criticising cowards 'a bang was heard, all took cover, later worrying where he was 'eventually he appeared: 'Pooh, that frightened y'all..!?'

Test another to, they asked 'Can you think of a word that's shorter than but sounds like 'sugar'?' -were told 'Sure' ~asked 'What is it, then..?'

Better than a dog that's bit one.. by getting on all fours to bite it back!?

Life said someone was like a glass of wine, many applauded ~one asked 'I don't see how?' -was told 'Well.. perhaps it isn't, then.'

Talent another's had 'one's own wasn't exactly Rin-Tin-Tin, the acting dog, was it?! How true.. that was trained!

Popularity was also smile 'vinegar merchant's smile brought more customers than honey merchant's frown.