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It seems as though I've always been a little bit afraid of driving. Now please don't misunderstand, I'm not one of those naturalist weirdos that is against technology in all its forms. On the contrary, I enjoy being driven around in the air conditioned comfort of a fine car. I have no problems with that. It's the thought of me actually driving that scares me. So you can imagine what a nightmare my driving lesson was.

Like all teenagers, I took drivers education to learn how to drive so I could get my driver's license. After all, being able to drive was one of the cornerstones of independence and would mean that I had developed my own wings right? Well it didn't really work out that way, as I was to find out to my utter disbelief. I never actually drove anything before in my first driving lesson was a disaster.

It started out badly when I got into the drivers seat and literally froze. I have to mention at this point that the instructor allotted to me for the duration of the driving lesson wasn't exactly awe inspiring. He looked at me like I love some kind of complete moron and that wasn't very comforting. So my first driving lesson began about as poorly as I possibly could have. I still don't know why or what caused me to be so tense. Maybe it was my lack of experience suddenly manifesting itself. Well, whatever it was, my first driving lesson couldn't have started any worse.

So that was it for driving lesson number one. I failed it. After all, they don't just hand out driver's licenses for opening a door and getting in the car. In any driving lesson, to the best of my knowledge, you have to actually drive or at the very least get the car to move a couple of millimeters in terms of distance in order to be considered for a pass grade. I couldn't even accomplish that. It was ugly.

Driving lessons are apparently not for me. I think it was a full five years after that first disastrous driving lesson that I mustered up the courage to enroll in an adult driving course. I was fortunately the youngest. But that too was little consolation as the only other people in the room were immigrants or country yokels, both of who had never ever seen a car in the first place! Who would have ever thought that a driving lessons could be so difficult. Oh well, my fault.