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Have you ever heard of someone that was 'so in love' but wasn't actually very happy? It is possible for this to happen because actually, what we sometimes refer to as 'love' isn't really love at all. Some people claim to 'love' another person and sacrifice 'everything' but later they find out that they weren't really happy because they weren't really considering their own needs in the first place. Before we can love someone and spread our happiness to them, we have to be happy ourselves.

Most of the time, love is associated with happiness but, when you start losing that love, you also start losing your happiness and you may find that you never really had those things to begin with. This kind of 'love' and 'happiness' is not really love and happiness at all. Unfortunately, these misconceptions are a lot more common than many people like to admit. Falling in and out of love happens all the time and nobody is ever really sure what makes things fall apart.

You've probably seen it before. In the beginning, two people walk hand in hand and seem to go together like night and day, coffee and cream, husband and wife. Over time, however, there are problems and they begin to feel bad, to argue and lose hope. Life is not without it's problems even when you are in love. Maintaining that love and that happiness is something that very few people are capable of because, actually, it comes from somewhere even deeper inside a person than they are truly aware of.

The thing that ultimately maintains our love and happiness in life is the energy that we get from inside ourselves. Deep inside us is a wellspring of energy that is very strong in some people but very weak in others. Without that wellspring of energy, you may find it hard to continue on in the face of many problems and challenges in your life. You may get discouraged or hurt very easily and find that you no longer feel the same way about your loved one that you initially felt. Your first impulses of love may fade and your happiness may begin to wane.

A lot of things can aggravate the negative feelings that we have inside ourselves and we may think that the person we love is 'no longer the same' or 'doesn't care about us anymore'. You may begin to feel that everything is hopeless and fail to see any light at the end of the tunnel. Something has gone wrong and you don't know what it is. The problem that has befallen you is that you never found that wellspring inside of yourself but wrongly imagined it to be coming from someone else. You were happy for a while but you didn't really know why. Those feelings of love and happiness weren't coming from the other person! You thought they were but, actually, they were coming from inside of you! It's true! They were coming from inside of you! Once that person begins to appear commonplace and boring, the feeling you had begins to fade. You no longer feel the great feelings of love that were actually coming from inside of you to start with. You decided to turn them off. Instead, you covered them up again and all you felt was a sense of darkness.

Life is always a problem but that's what makes you normal. Eventually, people come to recognize that all of their feelings actually come from inside of themselves and we are only coaxed into believing that one person or another person can make us happy. Just like the times we go to see a movie and find ourselves laughing or crying, it isn't that the people on the screen are real but that we have simply decided to believe in them for the time being while we are in the theater. We watch and we begin to experience emotions from inside ourselves, thinking that the characters on the screen are real. When we leave, we realize it was 'just a movie' and we were only fooled for a short time into feeling a lot of interesting emotions? Aren't we some very simple creatures! Who's really in charge here?

Real happiness comes from a heart that is so filled with genuine love that nothing on the outside can really affect it in any lasting way. There are rare people who have practiced many techniques and teachings and learned to overcome their fears and their negative emotions to find a wellspring of energy inside them which is the real place that love and happiness come from. If you are feeling discouraged or in need of an answer, look inside yourself for that wellspring and learn to face your fears and your challenges each day so that, over time, you will overcome the many problems that face you each and that face each and every one of us in life. Life is a long road with many challenges and the winners learn to lift up their heads and go on even in the hardest of times. Love and happiness are what make this world worthwhile, so let's keep our head up and learn to be the person in charge of our own destiny. We are truly the one's who are in charge and we can make it an award winning movie that everyone will pay to see!