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It used to be that I could never breathe on my own,

I had to have a hand to hold,

So that I could feel bold.

I sought you out,

With nothing but my tattered heart to offer.

I was afraid to trust,

I had closed myself up.

You look deep into my eyes,

And I felt that I could cry,

Not from pain,

But from feeling life again.

You entered my life like a storm,

Took me by surprise.

I will always be grateful to you,

For you saved me on that miserable day.

You made me fee love,

Where life was lost,

You made me feel that glow,

That certain happiness inside.

The feeling you ignite in me

Holds me captive,

Yet sets me free,

I'm falling hopelessly without a care.

The fever came over me,

Like a rock falling from a bridge,

The rush was intense,

The sensation was bliss.

"NOW"

I hear your name

And remember the pain.

There's an empty numbness in my heart now,

Do you remember when we loved?

Like ages ago, it's only been awhile.

How do you fair?

Has life been treating you well?

Do you still smile?

There's nothing but rain in my head,

I can't see your face.

I can't feel your touch'

What's happening to me?

Do you still think of me?

As I think of you?

Ambivalent feelings of love and loss,

Hate and scorn?

I used to write words for you,

Beautiful words filled with love so true,

Now I write these words for you instead,

Full of nothing, filled with emptiness.

You were my first in everything,

My one true love.

For that, you will always own a place in my heart.

I hope you remember me well and kindly too.

Here's to life,

And the shitty ways it's dealt me,

Causing me pain,

While still remembering your name.

It comes in a fog now,

So it's not so bad.

I just can't dwell,

Or I go all to hell.

When you die,

Whisper my name,

And perhaps we can share in Paradise,

As friends, as whatever, the way we were supposed to.