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If you have been reading my blog at 'Keep it Real in Sacramento' you know there are lots of emotional highs and lows that go with the territory of being a Realtor, especially when you care about your clients. At the top of my list for disappointments is when you discover a friend, you have regular contact with and who has told you in the past they would use and recommend you, hires another agent to market their home.

This is exactly what happened to my colleague and team member, Traci Butler. Traci told me, 'This is a friend and neighbor who I keep in contact with socially and genuinely like. I had no idea they were thinking of moving. We had discussed her willingness to refer me and I expected that if she were ever to move she would contact me. Of course, I didn't think they would be moving anytime in the near future.'

Even with the number of licensed Realtors declining, we understand that everyone knows an agent and has different criteria for selecting one to represent them. But when they lead you to believe they will recommend and use you, it 'really hurts' when you drive up to their home and find another Realtor's sign planted.

I am proud of Traci for not retreating and for contacting her friend. 'I just honestly wanted to know if there was anything I could have done differently. My goal is to grow and improve my business so the answer to this question was pretty important to me.'

What Traci learned from her friend was a comfort to hear. 'Her answer was, since there are several agents in the neighborhood, she decided to use a close grade school friend so she wouldn't offend the neighborhood agents.' Traci told me that she did understand her friends reasoning and wishes her and her family well. 'If there was anything I could change it would have been to hear it from her directly and day or so in advance. This business for me has always been about building relationships and helping people, so I couldn't help but feel hurt. By the way, I will miss having them in the neighborhood.'

I know there are many Realtors out there who care about people, want to help them and make a living doing it. Part of our business model is, naturally, to stay in touch with the people we know and like. These are the families we want to work for and hope they will use or recommend our services to others. Realtor's understand if there is a legitimate reason for selecting another agent but it is hurtful to us when we have to discover it ourselves.

Try to keep this in mind if you know and are in regular contact with someone who is a realtor.