| Home | Free Articles for Your Site | Submit an Article | Advertise | Link to Us | Search | Contact Us |
This site is an archive of old articles

    SEARCH ARTICLES


vertical line

Article Surfing Archive


Stop Putting Up With Stuff - Articles Surfing


Someone interrupts you while you are speaking. Your child raises his voice at you. A person speaks to you in a way you find offensive. Other people take credit for your ideas. You keep working longer and longer hours at work. Your family is constantly late coming to the dinner table. If you've experienced any of these scenarios, then it is time to stop putting up with stuff. It's time to strengthen your boundaries.

Boundaries are imaginary lines that surround and protect you and your goals from others. Anything that annoys you or makes you upset is often a crossed boundary. When your boundaries are weak, it may feel as if people are taking advantage of you or not respecting you. These feelings can often be damaging to one's self-esteem. They can also cause unneeded anxiety, stress and resentment. When you take the time to define and strengthen your boundaries, at home and at work, you will find yourself in a generally happier and calmer state.

Determining how others may interact with you, sticking to clear work hours and deciding your limits are all boundaries that will keep negative influences out of your way. Keep in mind boundaries are invisible. To effectively enforce your boundaries they must be communicated to those around you

Communicate Boundaries Gracefully

This seven-step process, keyed to the acronym RESPECT works every time. When you are communicating yoru boundaries, ensure you start the conversation with your voice devoid of any emotion. The tone of voice you use should be similar to how you sound when making a comment on the weather -- calm and confident.

R ' Recognize your boundaries are being crossed. Stop others as they start to cross the line. "Excuse me."

E ' Educate others that they are violating your boundary. "Do you realize you are yelling at me."

S ' Stop. Request that others stop. "I'd like you to stop yelling at me."

P ' Promote. Tell others how your limits can be respected. "Please speak to me calmly.'

E - Embrace others for cooperating. "Thank you for respecting my wishes."

If they are not cooperative, add these last steps. This very rarely happens. In most cases, people change their behavior after step two.

C ' Command that they stop 'I insist that you stop raiding yoru voice to me.' If nothing changes, then call it quits.

T ' Take off. Leave the situation. 'I can't have theis conversation while you are yelling at me. I am going to leave the room. Let's talk about this when we are not as upset.'

In some cases, people won't respect your boundaries even after you ask them to. But remember you are no longer putting up with anything from anyone so you might have to walk away from some individuals and situations. The only way to truly start taking better care of yourself is to let go of things that don't work for you.

Submitted by:

Lisa Martin

© Copyright 2006. Lisa Martin. All rights reserved.

Lisa Martin is a certified coach who inspires working mothers to achieve success that's balanced.

Author of Briefcase Moms: 10 Proven Practices to Balance Working Mothers' Lives,

Lisa is a sought-after expert and speaker on work-life balance issues. Known for her very personal and practical approach, Lisa coaches working mothers to know what they want and get what they want.

With 20 years of entrepreneurial and corporate experience, Lisa is also the founder and president of The Briefcase Moms Group ' a work-life coaching and training company that helps organizations attract, engage and retain working mothers. A mother herself, Lisa's powerful presentations and programs have helped thousands of women define success and balance on their own terms. http://www.briefcasemoms.com.


        RELATED SITES



https://articlesurfing.org/self_improvement/stop_putting_up_with_stuff.html

Copyright © 1995 - 2024 Photius Coutsoukis (All Rights Reserved).

ARTICLE CATEGORIES

Aging
Arts and Crafts
Auto and Trucks
Automotive
Business
Business and Finance
Cancer Survival
Career
Classifieds
Computers and Internet
Computers and Technology
Cooking
Culture
Education
Education #2
Entertainment
Etiquette
Family
Finances
Food and Drink
Food and Drink B
Gadgets and Gizmos
Gardening
Health
Hobbies
Home Improvement
Home Management
Humor
Internet
Jobs
Kids and Teens
Learning Languages
Leadership
Legal
Legal B
Marketing
Marketing B
Medical Business
Medicines and Remedies
Music and Movies
Online Business
Opinions
Parenting
Parenting B
Pets
Pets and Animals
Poetry
Politics
Politics and Government
Real Estate
Recreation
Recreation and Sports
Science
Self Help
Self Improvement
Short Stories
Site Promotion
Society
Sports
Travel and Leisure
Travel Part B
Web Development
Wellness, Fitness and Diet
World Affairs
Writing
Writing B