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Supporting The Mesothelioma Patient - Articles SurfingOf all the events in a lifetime, hearing a diagnosis for a loved one of something fatal like mesothelioma has to be the hardest. Even though there are some treatments available that may help to extend the patient's life slightly (maybe a couple of years) it doesn't change the fact that there is no cure for this condition. For the caregiver, this is a double blow. Not only is there the loved one to look after as the disease progression, but who is going to be there for you as you assist your loved ones to death's door? In the beginning the patient will still be able to many things on his own, but his emotional and mental state will be uncertain. He could be angry or resigned, accepting or disbelieving. In fact, chances are good; they will experience all of those. As the tasks of everyday life begin to get more difficult, the patient will have trouble doing very much and when he starts his treatments there will be days when he can do nothing. The burden to get through the day will fall on you. That means you will need to do all the shopping, planning and meal preparation, giving medication, getting the person to hospital or doctor's appointment, the banking and paperwork. Toward the end it's difficult on both of you as you prepare for the loved one's end of life. You can help further by having him talk with a counselor (or clergyperson), help to sort out wills, living wills and all legal documents, discuss the treatment options for advance care, and be there for whatever this person might need. Very often this means listening to them talk. While all of this is happening for them, it's important that you take care of yourself. Remember that if you don't take care of yourself, then there may not be anyone who will be there to take care of them. Take breaks out of the house, get out with friends. Talk with someone close who can understand what you're going through. Eat properly and make sure you get some rest. This is very important; burnout is an all too likely possibility for the caregiver. It will help if you try to stay organized and understand that when you might need extra help. The key here is recognizing the need before it becomes mandatory. There are support groups out there for both the patient and the caregiver, seriously consider them. Don't take on more than you can handle and understand there will be days when all is well and there will be days when you won't be able to stop crying. Understand that and go back to bed to get more rest. The end is coming, but it's important to enjoy every day and to understand that the time you have with your loved one is a gift. A gift you need to make the most of these last few months, weeks, days and hours. Be good to the patient and be especially good to yourself.
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